Della Bowles
December 2016
Della
Bowles
,
RN
Neuro Critical Care
Methodist University Hospital
Memphis
,
TN
United States

 

 

 

I would like to recognize the Neuro Critical Care team that cared for my son. I have known each person who cared for him for many years and have worked along beside them in many difficult situations. We have all provided complex-emergent care for so many patients. I have seen them provide unbelievable compassionate care to others on a regular basis, however, I didn't realize how amazing they actually were until I was the one needing their care.
It is every mother's nightmare to get the call in the middle of the night that your son is in the ED and not expected to make it and to come right away. Another nurse, B, not only had to make that call but had to make it to me, a friend and colleague. She handled it with professionalism, dignity, compassion, and grace.
I could go into a lot of detail about how B andSusonna went overboard, but to keep it brief, I will limit my story.
My son came into the ED at University, the place I have worked for 20 years, a place I am so proud to be a part of, a place that is like my home and that I have many friends at. He came in around 7 PM after being found down at a friend's house of a heroin overdose. I can tell you that our hearts are broken and we were devastated, to say the least. He was an aerospace engineer at FEDEX with an unbelievable future ahead of him. He wasn't estranged from us in any way and we talked to him on a daily basis. We had no idea of the demons he kept from us. He was an amazing kid with a loving spirit, a big heart, and a huge smile.
He came in intubated, unresponsive, and with unknown next of kin. B worked for hours to find his next of kin because she didn't want him to die alone. She realized he was someone's son, someone's brother, and someone's grandson. She had absolutely no idea he was the son of one of her cohorts. It took almost 6 hours for her to put the puzzle piece together. She went over and above looking on social media to try and find his family. She linked him to me by the grace of God.
She also linked Susonna to me. Susonna just happened to be working that night and she and B are friends as well. B called her to come down the ED and discuss the situation. Susonna and B ultimately called me and in a very professional way told me to come to the ED.
Upon arriving, the entire ED staff met me with the most respect. Each person felt my heartache and was so genuine. A doctor met me in front of his door and explained everything in detail and said, "Before you go in, I want you to think about his dignity." Everyone was very open and honest yet sympathetic and compassionate.
Not only did they work for hours finding my son's next of kin, once they found me and knew that I worked in Neuro Critical Care for over 15 years they decided to go get him from the neuro unit and bring him back to the ED out of respect for me and the coworkers that I worked beside for so many years. They realized how hard this would be for everyone involved. They also wanted to keep my affairs private and not spread my family's laundry throughout the hospital.
I would like to also thank the Neuro Critical Care team for taking excellent care of him and being so respectful of me and my son. They are an excellent group that I have been blessed and honored to work with for many years. Della Bowles was the nurse assigned to him so I know he was in the best of hands. She is an excellent nurse. I wouldn't have wanted him to go anywhere else despite the situation. I know the neuro team was devastated to receive him and to realize he was my child. They knew him from the stories I have told throughout the years. They watched him grow up via pictures I shared. They knew me and knew that my family is my life. I cannot imagine what they must have felt. I know them and I know they are compassionate. I know their hearts hurt for me.
It also made me so appreciative of the boss I have. I wasn't here 30 minutes and she came in to be by my side to support me and to cry with me. I could not work for a more sincere and compassionate boss.
We were not here long, as my son was actually brain dead.
This is still so hard to say and hard to accept but the Lord has held our hands and walked this journey with us. He has given us joy along the way when we feel we can't go on. The past several months have been a blur but the Lord has been faithful to hold our hand and allow His Holy Spirit to comfort our hearts.
I have written down the ways the Lord has provided JOY through our journey and the first entry in my journal is that my son came to University Hospital and that he was cared for bymyteam! We have excellent people who work here and take such good care of our patients and their families. That night I wasn't an employee, I was a mother in a major crisis who needed a healthcare team to take care of her son, herself, her son's father, and her son's grandparents. There are no words to express my gratitude to all the teams that took care of my son that night. Though they all were important and amazing, Della put herself in someone else's shoes and did what she would want someone to do for her. That is what life is all about: making a difference in the lives we touch and it is certainly the MLH way. She made an impact on me that neither I nor my family with ever forget.