My husband was at BMC for about a week. That week and the 2 leading up to it were the hardest weeks of our lives. We went from thinking he had an ulcer and a blockage to finding out he had pancreatic cancer. Then we were told if we had a surgical option that he might have another 5 years but without that, we only had about 3-6 months. Within a day they told us that he only had about a week or a little longer to live. We were also told he could not go home because he needed the hospital equipment to keep him comfortable. That’s when we ended up in SW5.

The entire staff on that floor was very friendly and supportive. However, nurse Amy is my special guardian angel. She truly cared for my husband, my family as well as me. Amy worked the 7p-7a shift. For me, when the hospital was quiet and all the visitors were gone, my fear, grief, and emotions would take over. I tried so hard to stay strong for my husband and my children throughout the day. There were a few occasions when my husband was asleep that I would go into the hall and break down. Amy would embrace me in the most comforting way. She would hold me in a comforting hug and remind me that it’s ok to be scared and even cry. She really took the time to talk to me and to make sure that I was sleeping, eating, and taking care of myself.

The night before we were scheduled to disconnect the oxygen from my husband was especially bad. He had visitors on and off all day and was very awake, alert, and clear-minded. He was talking to everyone and comforting them as the time of his passing was drawing near. When everyone left and he was asleep I went into the bathroom to get ready for bed. I was so overcome with grief, fear, anxiety, and stress that I totally broke down and was hysterical. I remember sitting on the bathroom floor and banging the back of my head against the wall. I believe I started to scream but am honestly not sure. I do know that I ended up laying on the bathroom floor pounding my fists and kicking my feet. I honestly don’t know if I was hysterical for 5 minutes or an hour. What I do know is that Amy was laying on the bathroom floor with me and holding me close. Her gentle words and soft voice telling me to let it out and it was ok to be scared. She helped me up and walked me to the sitting area by the windows. She had someone call a family member to come and stay with my dying husband so he wouldn’t worry about me while she helped me settle down. Amy talked to me very gently and held me until I settled down. Her kindness and compassion helped me cope as I faced my biggest fear, the thought of losing the love of my life. She made sure I settled down and got some sleep and continued to check on me and my husband throughout the night.

When her shift was over and before she left for the day, Amy came back to check on my husband and me. She gave me a big hug and told me that I was strong and would get through this heartbreaking time. My husband thanked her and said if circumstances were different, he would make something special to remind her of what a true, genuine, and wonderful nurse she is. He did instruct me to give her one of his handcrafted wood creations as a thank you for everything she did for us. It wasn’t as special as he would have liked but he wasn’t going to be around to make the gift he wanted to. However, he hoped the small token would warm her heart as she did ours. Thank you for all the love and care!