Recently, Audrey Palmer made the transition from assistant nurse manager to nurse manager of my unit. I had the absolute pleasure of meeting her in that ANM office within my first two weeks of hire, already getting a talking to. If you knew me personally, I can be quite "mouthy" and sometimes "difficult" to understand. I come from a childhood of poverty, violence, active addiction, and absent parents. Prior to becoming a nurse, I was following down the "generational curse" that was laid before me.

Quite often, I get called "Audrey's Favorite," and I find that hilarious, considering I am not sure if she ever has written a "note to file" in someone's chart, and I have somehow acquired four. I also don't think this woman has ever dealt with Human Resources or campus police as much as she has with anyone else but me. Being "the fiercest advocate" has earned me a permanent spot in a chair in her office, nameplate and all. The first time I ever met Audrey was during orientation, and she was "educating me" on my dress code. Three years later, this woman continues to "educate me" at least once a shift, but with a much bigger impact.

When I think of a great leader, mentor, or role model, my first thought is her. Audrey is the first one to hear my side of the story and validate my concerns and feelings. She will also be the first to tell me if I am wrong, which is more often than I personally would like. She will cancel meetings, go home late, and go as far as accommodating my schedule to make sure I feel like a situation is handled. She continues to provide me with resources and support and coach me in the most positive direction as management of our unit. With the background that I have- a strong leader is not something that I have witnessed firsthand. Audrey handles such challenging and diverse situations with such grace, and it’s admirable. The trust that I have in her as a manager to have my best professional and personal interest at heart, as well as her trust that I would have her back as her employee, is unwavering. She continues to show a willingness to deliver honest and very open feedback while remaining respectful and receptive.

Audrey has taken a chance on me. At first, I come off as abrasive, a taste you either love right away or never want to try again. I had a little more than a year of true bedside under my belt, I had zero experience in intensive care nursing, and my “refined ghetto” personality was quite the opposite of textbook Audrey. We developed a relationship as she would round and check up on nurses on the unit, watching me handle critical situations and giving me feedback on how I could improve, always asking how she could help me and if I needed anything. In those little moments, I am most certainly positive she had no idea how she impacted my bedside manner. Audrey was always the first to give me encouragement, gave an ear to my wondering sentences as I “thought out loud,” and helped me build my confidence as a nurse at the bedside.

Audrey helped me find my backbone. This woman, who didn’t owe the “loud new hire” two seconds of her time, helped me find my voice- when my entire life, I never had one. The nurse that I am today is because of her. I am not sure that there are truly words that express how eternally grateful I am for her. One of the greatest gifts that someone can receive in life is finding someone who truly supports them unconditionally, celebrates victories with them, and continues to treat them with grace-and that is Audrey to me. Audrey has been the most impactful person in my life. She has held me accountable, pushed me to my full potential, and made me conquer my fears head-on - all while loving me as a nurse, and that's something I could never thank her enough for. Because of her, I am a better human, and if that isn't a testimony to how incredible she is, I'm not sure what would be.