Our mother, D, entered the hospital for what we believed would be a short stay due to a wound infection needing medical attention. 

A few days into her stay our mother's condition began to deteriorate due to her lung cancer and the radiation she had previously received. 

She had a very complex medical situation with five different specialists involved in her care as well as many different care providers assisting with her treatment. Our family began to realize that the center of our family was likely not going to survive this latest struggle. 

Our 85-year-old mother’s background includes being a former ARNP for over 40 years (one of the first in the state of KS) with two master’s degrees and a nurse educator who often believed her way was the only way. Our mother had a very tough shell, and it was very difficult to crack that shell, especially for individuals in the medical field. 

One morning, a new nurse walked in that we had not had before. Even though every nurse she encountered was thoughtful, caring, and compassionate, Beti became the light in a very dark tunnel for us. Beti stepped into that room and with her heartwarming tone and smile, I saw an ease come over my mom I had not seen before. Beti immediately placed her hand on my mom's arm and introduced herself and then carried on a conversation with her about her life back in Hays and her family. Instantly, the two of them had a bond that brought tears to my eyes, and I knew we were exactly where we needed to be. 

Over the next four days (3 days of 12-hour shifts and one day of a 16-hour shift) Beti requested to be my mom's nurse each day and we are incredibly blessed that Beti's supervisors agreed to that request. While tiny in stature, Beti was a powerhouse in coordinating all her care and getting things done to make certain our mother was comfortable and that we all understood what was going to happen and when and why. The amount of patience and compassion that Beti showed our mom was beyond anything I could explain, especially when she was struggling to breathe or couldn't get comfortable or the constant changing of bandages. 

Our mom was so at ease with Beti that she was no longer telling her how to be a nurse, but instead, they became friends, a team, partners to battle these struggles together. All the while, Beti was worried about all of us eating, sleeping, and taking breaks from the room. As the pain of breathing became worse, Beti checked on her for what seemed to be every 30 minutes, making sure she was as comfortable as possible. 

On day 4 of Beti's schedule, she told my mom, "Ms. D, today we are going to get you all cleaned up, change your clothes and your bedding, and fix your hair because I want you to look your best tomorrow when all of your family from Hays comes to visit you." This was a Friday and Beti was going to be off until the following Tuesday. At the end of her shift, I thanked her and told her that she made this trying time easier with her love and care towards our mom. Beti asked if she could give me a hug and I said absolutely. Beti then said I don’t know if your mom will still be here or not, but if your mom is here with us on Tuesday, I will request to be her nurse. My response through tears was that my mom, the former ARNP/nurse educator with a hard shell, is very proud of you, Beti. 

Our mom passed away on Monday, so these two amazing ladies did not see each other again but I am certain those 4 days meant a great deal to both of them and I will never forget that my mom looked wonderful and fresh for all of her grandkids on Saturday when they visited because Beti wanted that day to be perfect for D.