Janice Irvine tells about her experience:

I took care of a young couple in MICU. He was an electrician and she works in an office. They just got married, but they were together since high school. He quit his job as a lineman because it was a very high risk job. They were preparing to start a family. A few weeks into his new job, he got electrocuted through a small pinhole in his work gloves. He coded in the field, then we received him in MICU to start hypothermia.

When I came in to work that night, I could not get out of the elevator because the hallway was packed with all their friends and family. Apparently, he was simply the best human being around. When I was getting report, I had very high hopes for him. He was young, and he was only down for a few minutes. His coworkers had started CPR and used the AED on him before EMS got there. Easy right?

Anyway, the story wouldn't be complete if I didn't mention his wife. She is young, so sweet, so in love, and just so full of hope for their future. I just loved her and their family instantly. She was so anxious and she refused to leave his side. I remember that night was easy. The hypothermia was working great and his numbers were all perfect. Then, he started to seize, and he never stopped. His wife was so sad, so torn apart. She told me that on the day this happened, he was trying to cuddle with her and be sweet to her. But she was running late for work. She said to me, "What was so important that day that I couldn't take just five minutes to tell him I loved him?" My heart was breaking... is still breaking for this girl.


When the time came for the doctors to let them know that he was essentially brain dead, she knew in her heart that she needed to let him go. But she was so scared at the thought of never seeing him again. All she wanted to do was lay next to him and hold him again. So Brittany Schrank, BSN, RN and Kelly Noughton, BSN, RN got him on a bariatric bed, and they rearranged everything to one side of him so she could lay next to him on the other side. When I came to work, I told her to go take a shower while I gave him a bath. Then I tucked them both in. Until that night, she only had maybe ten minutes of sleep before she would get up and check on him. That night she slept next to him, she slept for four hours straight. He passed away two days later.

I still think of them. Their story lives inside my heart to this day, especially when I read your email about the theme for Nurses Week. When we take care of patients who we know are just suffering, it's very easy to be judgmental. I can personally tell you that I've been one of those nurses. But seeing his wife go through so much hurt reminded me that it is very hard to let go of people you love. One minute they're so alive and there, then the next minute their touch, their smiles, their presence, things we took for granted are taken away.... permanently. And we find ourselves just wishing, hoping for one more day. As nurses, we need to overcome our own emotions when we are dealt with ethical issues. Yes, we try to advocate, but the permanent loss is not ours to bear. I think we should definitely still educate and present the truth, but we shouldn't lose our compassion. We should hold their hearts, and remember that it is their heart that is broken right now. And we need to let them know, that whatever decision they make, we will still care.