My story started 9 years ago, after shoulder surgery and an array of prescription drugs. I was prescribed Vicodin for my post-surgical pain, but after taking it for a while I expressed concern to my doctor about physical dependence. My doctor agreed and prescribed Ultram instead, but that made no difference. I was starting to realize that I was addicted because without the medication I would become very ill. I sought out the help of a Pain Clinic Provider who put me on a different medication, but after 9 years I was on a higher dose and more medications than I had started with.
During this time, whenever I would go to an ER for a different medical reason they would look at my medication list and instantly label me a "drug addict" and "just another junkie". I had always taken the medications exactly as prescribed and never gained any great sensation or pleasure from them. The reality was I had to continue taking the medication to avoid feeling deathly sick. I had become numb to emotions, my head was clouded, and I was going through life like a robot. I could not plan trips or vacations away from home around refill time because I HAD to have the drug.
6 months ago, I decided that I deserved better and I no longer wanted to live my life as a servant to these drugs. My wife, kids, and grandkids deserved more than just a shell of a man. I stopped taking the medication and the morning of the second day I became very sick and started having chest pain and lots of withdrawals. My wife brought me to the hospital where I met 2 extraordinary people. After ruling out a heart attack they could see how sick I was and my story began to unfold. I was embarrassed, angry, broken and absolutely sure I didn't want these nurses to know my story because of how I had been treated in the past. Much to my surprise, instead of receiving judgment, I received compassion and understanding. Even after the first nurse's shift ended they stayed and talked with me about the opioid crisis in our country and told me that it wasn't my fault. They both assured me that I could do this and that they were there to help. For the first time ever, I felt like someone believed me! They listened to me then they talked and got me the resources I needed to get into a detox center right away. They really cared!
When I returned home from treatment, I was walking around my property in the woods trying to digest this all. As I called my dogs, and I realized I could hear my own echo. I was seeing colors that I haven't seen in years and I was having clear thoughts. I know that sounds "hokey", but it is the absolute truth. I have never turned back; I am clean. I still struggle with the side effects from this drug, but I'm told those will subside with time. I will never forget that morning and the 2 people who not only believed me, but they believed in me! I want to thank these 2 Extraordinary Nurses who truly gave me the ability to save my own life.