Earlier this year, my wife M passed away in the Surgical ICU at the Lahey Hospital in Burlington, MA while under the care of Nurse Emily Johnson. Emily had also been M's nurse for the same twelve-hour shift on the previous day when we decided to stop all treatments and just make her comfortable. At that point, M had been a patient in the SICU for 17 days, with almost all of that time on a ventilator. All of the doctors and the nurses who looked after M during her stay in the SICU provided her with excellent medical services that were both competent and caring.
Emily provided M with superb care that combined the best possible medicine with priority attention to her comfort. She was so attentive to M, concerned about her welfare and always seemed to know just what M needed to feel a bit better. She really cared about M, got to know who she was and helped her to pass from life with dignity, grace, and peace.
Emily did much more than just treat M, since she looked after my four adult daughters and me, helping us understand and cope with the fact that M would be leaving us soon. She really was the catalyst in creating an atmosphere in the SICU room where we could show our love for M, bring laughter and tears, as appropriate, to her final hours, help her leave this world in peace. While her daughters and I had great sorrow at her passing, thanks to Emily we knew we had done all we could to prepare her, make her comfortable and show her our love.
As background, M was considerably weakened by a series of seven related surgeries and trips to the operating room in her last fifteen months. She was no stranger to the SICU, having had shorter visits there after two of the earlier surgeries.
As a result of previous surgeries, M had no right hip joint. This latest surgery was to remove some heterotopic bone that was growing around her right hip and interfering with her bending at the waist. She and I were also hopeful that removing this bone would put her in a better position to get a new hip joint, which would correct her right leg being two and one-half inches shorter than the left, although we knew the probabilities were remote.
After this operation, she arrived at the SICU with massive hemorrhaging and loss of respiratory function. I witnessed everything being done to arrest these problems and restore her to good health, while also keeping her comfortable. As said earlier, the doctors, nurses, and specialist who treated her did a wonderful job. Everyone was clearly competent, highly knowledgeable about how to deal with her problems and wanted to do the right thing for her. However, Emily clearly brought all of that to M, but brought something more; her own unique blend of competence, caring, and compassion that brought us a deeper understanding of M's situation and a confidence that M, our daughters and I could effectively deal with it.
A look into M's ICU room during her last days is perhaps the most effective way to explain the "Emily effect". On the first of these two days, we had a conference around noon at the foot of M's bed with several of M's doctors and Emily to discuss discontinuing all treatments and just making her comfortable until the end. Now off the ventilator and just on oxygen, M overhears this and signals to me she has something to say, even though she can barely talk and make herself understood. I pull her oxygen mask to one side, and hear her whisper "I want to go home" and "Let go". So, we had the blessing of knowing what she wanted and I was confident that Emily would keep her as comfortable as possible. M had just one more word to speak her "last word". This was "champagne". So, two of my daughters went out and returned with a fine bottle of champagne and six glasses. We toasted M, as I put some champagne on a sponge and moistened her lips with it.
On the next day, an enthusiastic New England Patriots fan is lying in her hospital bed under a National Football League blanket covered with Patriots' logos. The Super Bowl is scheduled to start around 3 pm in the afternoon. Her four daughters are around her, and I am at her side. We are going through boxes of family photos, recalling all the special occasions, births, anniversaries, vacations, etc. that M loved. Her favorite music is playing. M's breathing is labored, but we really think she hears us.
We turn the TV on to the Super Bowl as it starts, but note that M's breathing has become even more labored. Emily suggests to me that it would be perfectly fine if I climbed into bed with M. She arranges M and pillows so that I can lie next to her and hold her in my arms. I have a verse from the bible in Proverbs, in my pocket about how "a valiant woman is worth more than pearls". At halftime, with the Patriots losing to the Atlanta Falcons by 21 to 0, M's labored breathing has become even more noticeable, with long pauses between breaths. I think this is the time I read a section from Proverbs to M and our daughters, and take it from my pocket. With M in my arms, I read aloud. It is perfect of her wonderful qualities. I know she was alive when I started reflecting this verse. When I finished the six lines and looked at my wife, I can see she has left us during this reading.
After a doctor confirmed that M had left us, Emily encourages us to take all the time we needed to be with her. We finally knew it was time to leave for home, so we picked up M's few belongings in her ICU room, and went home. My daughters turned on the TV at home to catch the last plays of the Super Bowl, we were all shocked that the Patriots had completely turned the game around and were decisively winning. We like to think that M, a big Patriots fan, was now in heaven and making the difference in the game.
The next time we saw Emily was at M's wake. We had no idea she would attend, and we were delighted that she came to this service. M always dressed in a very tasteful and stylish fashion, and we had her in her nicest clothes. While not looking at her casket could tell, M was wearing a beautiful pair of Jimmy Choo shoes with three-inch heels. One of the drawbacks of having one very short leg was that M could no longer wear her beautiful high heel shoes she had in her closet, but we were determined that she appear at the "Pearly Gates" in her very best pair. Well, knowing M as thoroughly as she did, Emily appeared at her wake in a spectacular pair of Christian Louboutin boots, with red soles and all. We knew this would bring a smile to M's face.
Emily was really special to M, our daughters and me. We will be eternally grateful Emily, and always consider her a very dear friend of our family. We will always remember M's last days in a special way because of Emily.