My husband has been a patient in unit 1a at Hyland for numerous weeks now. I call frequently to speak with him, in conjunction with speaking to staff for updates. From day 1, the care and compassion I have felt from Lou are unconditional. Until yesterday, I had not visited my husband since his admission as to not cause further stress on him. I spent time at home struggling with my own family, tearfully worried for my husband, and in the dark about so much when it comes to mental health. I had spoken with maybe one or two staff members prior to conversing with Lou for the first time. From our first conversation, I knew that she was a nurse whom I completely trusted to be taking care of my husband. When giving me updates, she went far beyond, he’s anxious/depressed and not participating. Lou spoke of my loving husband’s presentation, characteristics, and strengths. She would explain her assessment thoroughly with deep care for my husband but also managed to keep his integrity and privacy. She answered my questions, addressed my concerns, sought out answers for me, and gave ME support when all felt lost. I learned through her coworkers that she only works on the weekends. I spent the weekdays focusing on my outside life and preparing our home for what the return of my husband would look like. Then on the weekends, I was able to take a deep breath and focus on my husband and his well-being. Without the consistency of Lou being my husband’s nurse weekend after weekend, I am not sure how I would have stayed as sane as I have!

Lou could have stopped there and only have been kind via the telephone, and I would have had no clue. Except this was absolutely further from the truth about her. Day after day I spoke with my husband on the phone. I listened to my grown husband weep while telling me how depressed he was and how much he wanted to die. The heartbreak I was feeling was unmeasurable and felt so unbearable. Shortly into his stay, there was one phone call in which he told me. D, I have a nurse who listens to me. All of me, D. As he sobbed on the phone. He went on to tell me how a young woman who he thought was only in her 20s would spend time with him every shift she was present. He explained how Lou encouraged his emotions and sat on the floor of the hallway outside his room when he felt too ashamed for crying and told her to leave. He has struggled with some depression his whole life, but we came from a generation where that was frowned upon and unacceptable. He never was told it is okay to have feelings, never given any form of theory, never learned what medicines his doctors put him on, and never had his own questions answered. Hearing that a nurse was able to provide him with knowledge, compassion, understanding, and support is something that every spouse wishes for.

Starting ECT treatments was terrifying for both of us. What is this, why are you shocking him, is it safe, and so many more questions raced. Lou’s mind amazed me as she answered every one of our questions with words that were both educational, but also easy to understand for two older adults like us. Even down to the smallest act of Lou cleaning his CPAP face mask for him without asking, always giving him shower supplies even when he didn’t want to get out of bed, and a constant supply of word searches or sudokus to keep his mind busy. Lou has provided the utmost Christ-like care that I have ever known. While mental health, depression, and suicide are terrifying, I have faith and solitude knowing that my husband has the opportunity to be taken care of by someone like Lou.

Yesterday was the first day I visited my husband since he was admitted for severe depression and suicide. Yesterday I walked on the unit and was greeted by a nurse. Without hesitation, I knew it was Lou by her tone of voice and composure. She was all that I had imagined in my head. As soon as I said my name, she knew me and she conversed with me like we had many, many times before. It brought a tear to my eye when she told me that it was good to finally meet you after talking about you so much with D. My husband also said he was glad that I got to meet Lou because he was worried he would have to go home without me ever visiting. The visit with my husband went great, despite the circumstances and tears. I heard my sweet husband laugh again and heard stories of his time at Hyland. I was able to speak and ask Lou questions, plus get to see her in action with all of the other patients. Two hours went by too quickly. But I left Hyland today knowing that my husband is in the right place with the right people. I thank God that he has provided a facility in St. Louis to take care of the sick. And I pray that his work will continue to be done. To all of those helping my husband survive, I love each and every one of you.