It has been a very long week for our family. I have been at the hospital by myself with our beautiful 5-week-old baby as she fights RSV while my husband is home with our other two children, both under the age of three. When a parent has a child in the hospital, especially as young as our littlest one, it's incredibly taxing, both physically and mentally. On day six, I was talking with an RT and realized that I was unable to comprehend what he was saying. Then I was suddenly very hot, then cold, then felt as though I would vomit. I quickly excused myself to go outside for some air. The social worker met with me when I came back inside, but the only help that could really be offered to me other than talking it out was to go to an adult hospital for an evaluation which was out of the question at that time.
Megan was the nurse that came in on the next shift and inquired as to my well-being. I disclosed the waterfall of taxing emotions, as well as the physical and mental manifestations. I told Megan how long it had been since I rarely slept and why. With a smile that never faltered and a cheerful attitude that never wavered, Megan quickly offered to take the baby for as long as she was able to. She finished up her active duties, cleared and set up another room close by, and took my tiny baby girl into her protective arms to spend time with her while I got some much needed uninterrupted sleep.
That night Megan did bring my sweet girl back into the room, but she was right there with her to suction when it was needed and to have a bottle of pre-expressed breast milk ready to feed her when she was hungry. I awoke the next morning refreshed and feeling like I could handle life again. I now know that I experienced a panic attack induced by a combination of sleep deprivation as well as the stress of a teeny baby being in the hospital and two other sweet babies at home. I also feel it pertinent to mention that this all occurred on Christmas Day when I couldn't be home with all of my beautiful children, and our nurse, Megan, had to be at work and away from her family as well. Megan saved my sanity. I was so tired, so lost, so sad and anxious, and she came in like an angel and brought back my humanity. There are not enough words to thank Megan, and I now feel equipped to get through the rest of this illness with my sweet baby girl. God bless you, Megan.