On Saturday I was 1:1 with this very sick ICU patient; this is not unusual. The patient touched my heart, as she was incredibly sick and still able to smile and follow commands, even though she was on extremely high ventilator settings on the VDR. Often when our patients are this sick we know they have a very small chance of a positive outcome. She was very sick with many comorbidities.
As morning came the inevitable happened and the patient lost her blood pressure and then her pulse. As a team, ICU 1 began to code her. I could nominate each of my coworkers and tell you that, while everything was not perfect, we were a team and met the goal of getting the patient's pulse back. However, the patient would soon code again, then again, and again. She would code multiple times because some things cannot be fixed.
The point of this story is not to show what an excellent job we do in Critical Care. The point is to simply tell you that this code was different. This code is one that leaves a nurse just a little bit broken, a bit hurt. This is one of those shifts where the tears start in the car on the way home and continue until you have run every possible scenario in your head and sleep becomes vastly important so you can return to care for the next patients to come to you.
At Winchester Medical Center we have so many wonderful nurses; they give so much to the patients. I believe Sherri Jenkins and Courtney McNeely are true DAISY Nurses. Not because of the code, not because of the amazing compressions Sherri did, and not for the godsend it was that Courtney stepped up to chart for me. So many people performed their jobs that night and helped me perform mine.
Let me explain: After those types of shifts sometimes we are broken. It is hard to come back through those doors sometimes. As broken as I was, when I returned to work the next night with the "must tackle this shift" attitude I really wasn't my best self. That was until I saw Sherri, who gave me a gift bag with tea, and a hug (but don't tell anyone she did that). Then I saw Courtney, who also had the kindest words and tea for me. They gave me exactly what I needed; they fixed me.
So many times we give all we can to our patients. Over and over we give them all we have. Most of the nurses at WMC are here to do just that. How do you pick the most compassionate nurse when they are all selfless and give everything? You find the ones who are like that when nobody is watching when they are not on the clock. The ones who can fix a slightly broken coworker because they just knew I needed it.

Note: This is Sherri's 2nd DAISY Award!