Susan Peevy
September 2014
Susan
Peevy
,
RN
Women's Services
Piedmont Newnan Hospital
Newnan
,
GA
United States
Ms. Susan had a patient who had a fetal demise. The 3 year old sister wanted to see her brother so Susan warmed the baby up, wrapped him up in blankets, and found a white dove pin to put on the blanket. She told the 3 year old a story of how she will always have her brother with her through the dove pin. She showed so much compassion! The 4th floor is lucky to have you!
In order to give this extraordinary story justice, Susan was told we were working on a project and we needed her to recollect it and put it in writing. Little did she know the project was for her! Here is Susan's touching recollection:
My Dove Story
Recently one of my assignments was Room 423. Little did I know that on this Saturday morning my patient was to become one of my most memorable and humbling moments in all my years of nursing.
The patient was a lady in her mid-thirties who, the day before, had delivered an IUFD (intrauterine fetal demise). This mother had just experienced the loss of her 16 week pregnancy, the boy fetus weighing only 3 ounces.
People grieve in their own way and in their own time. We as nurses are trained to recognize their needs, sometimes just be there, sit quietly with them, and to pay attention to their physical environment and spiritual needs.
This Saturday morning was the day of discharge for the patient and the patient's mother along with her 3 year old daughter had arrived to take her home.
The mother/patient had been tearful and quiet that morning and after the formalities of discharge (paperwork, and other tasks) I asked her if she would like to see her baby boy one more time and that I could bring him to the room and allow her all the time that she needed. She shook her head no and then headed toward the door to the wheelchair - that is when I heard this little voice say, "I do"! The 3 year old daughter who had been sitting quietly in the room, almost forgotten asked to see her baby brother. I became numb, but the child was so sincere and innocent in her wish.
After receiving a nod from the mother, I headed down the hall to get her "little baby brother". In my mind I was trying to find words to prepare and comfort the 3 year old and family. What could I say to to prevent her from possibly being traumatized for life? It is difficult for an adult to view a 16 week baby and I could hardly imagine this 3 year old's reaction. How could I prepare her for seeing her brother?
The baby brother had been cleaned up, dressed with a blue knit cap on his head and wrapped beautifully in a crocheted blanket. I placed him in a small wicker basket. Before leaving the bereavement room I looked around for a keepsake or a trinket to lie on top of the blanket. Suddenly I saw a tiny white dove and I knew that God had placed that dove there at just the right time for me to use in this very special moment.
When I arrived to room 423 carrying the baby brother in the small wicker basket, the little sister was sitting very quietly on the windowsill. I prayed for God's guidance and sat down beside the girl, looked at mother for permission to continue, and then proceeded to say, "Now your little brother is not going to look like other little brothers you have seen before, he is going to look very special because he is special. He was born very, very early." As I handed her the dove I said, "Do you know what this is?" She shook her head no. I said, "This is a special bird called a dove, and it is very beautiful. It spreads its wings and flies so high, it is white, pretty, and soft. God sent it as a special gift for you to remember your little brother. This dove is yours to take home and to keep in your room. When you are sad and think about your baby brother just take the dove out to remember him." I then asked if she was ready to see her brother - holding the dove in her little hand - I removed the blanket and said, "See he is special just like your dove. She then felt his hands and touched his feet and it appeared that the sweet little girl was content. I left the basket for her to view another moment and I knew that my prayers had been answered.
Will that little girl keep her dove and have a special memory of her brother? - I'll never know, but I do know that she and I experienced a genuine "God Moment" with that little white dove.
In order to give this extraordinary story justice, Susan was told we were working on a project and we needed her to recollect it and put it in writing. Little did she know the project was for her! Here is Susan's touching recollection:
My Dove Story
Recently one of my assignments was Room 423. Little did I know that on this Saturday morning my patient was to become one of my most memorable and humbling moments in all my years of nursing.
The patient was a lady in her mid-thirties who, the day before, had delivered an IUFD (intrauterine fetal demise). This mother had just experienced the loss of her 16 week pregnancy, the boy fetus weighing only 3 ounces.
People grieve in their own way and in their own time. We as nurses are trained to recognize their needs, sometimes just be there, sit quietly with them, and to pay attention to their physical environment and spiritual needs.
This Saturday morning was the day of discharge for the patient and the patient's mother along with her 3 year old daughter had arrived to take her home.
The mother/patient had been tearful and quiet that morning and after the formalities of discharge (paperwork, and other tasks) I asked her if she would like to see her baby boy one more time and that I could bring him to the room and allow her all the time that she needed. She shook her head no and then headed toward the door to the wheelchair - that is when I heard this little voice say, "I do"! The 3 year old daughter who had been sitting quietly in the room, almost forgotten asked to see her baby brother. I became numb, but the child was so sincere and innocent in her wish.
After receiving a nod from the mother, I headed down the hall to get her "little baby brother". In my mind I was trying to find words to prepare and comfort the 3 year old and family. What could I say to to prevent her from possibly being traumatized for life? It is difficult for an adult to view a 16 week baby and I could hardly imagine this 3 year old's reaction. How could I prepare her for seeing her brother?
The baby brother had been cleaned up, dressed with a blue knit cap on his head and wrapped beautifully in a crocheted blanket. I placed him in a small wicker basket. Before leaving the bereavement room I looked around for a keepsake or a trinket to lie on top of the blanket. Suddenly I saw a tiny white dove and I knew that God had placed that dove there at just the right time for me to use in this very special moment.
When I arrived to room 423 carrying the baby brother in the small wicker basket, the little sister was sitting very quietly on the windowsill. I prayed for God's guidance and sat down beside the girl, looked at mother for permission to continue, and then proceeded to say, "Now your little brother is not going to look like other little brothers you have seen before, he is going to look very special because he is special. He was born very, very early." As I handed her the dove I said, "Do you know what this is?" She shook her head no. I said, "This is a special bird called a dove, and it is very beautiful. It spreads its wings and flies so high, it is white, pretty, and soft. God sent it as a special gift for you to remember your little brother. This dove is yours to take home and to keep in your room. When you are sad and think about your baby brother just take the dove out to remember him." I then asked if she was ready to see her brother - holding the dove in her little hand - I removed the blanket and said, "See he is special just like your dove. She then felt his hands and touched his feet and it appeared that the sweet little girl was content. I left the basket for her to view another moment and I knew that my prayers had been answered.
Will that little girl keep her dove and have a special memory of her brother? - I'll never know, but I do know that she and I experienced a genuine "God Moment" with that little white dove.