The hospital has never been a good place for me throughout my life. The thought has always given me anxiety. The day I woke up with a second Spontaneous Pneumothorax and was told I would have to go back to the hospital, I was instantly devastated. Nevertheless, I remained optimistic and thought to myself, “Let’s just keep your head up and get this done!” When I arrived, I found out the chest tube was not enough to fix the issue, and surgery was going to be needed to hopefully prevent this in the future. Of course, I was not excited or super willing to do the surgery. Still, after discussing it with doctors and family, I decided it was better for my health and longevity of life to do the procedure.
Before the procedure, I had a lot of anxiety from prior hospital experiences, as well as being in my own head about a few things. I’m sure many have felt this way. After my procedure, of course, I was still very anxious, but I was extremely lucky and woke up to a very caring nurse, Viannelly Perez. Viannelly was there for me every second I needed her and, more importantly, the times I told her I didn’t need her. Specifically, when after the surgery, the chest tube was pulled, and I found out that yet another tube needed to be inserted. At this point, my anxiety and brain were out of my control, and I was feeling very defeated. Viannelly assured me this was for the best, that everything would be fine, and that I was very strong for this, even though I felt very weak.
When the new chest tube was being inserted, I, of course, had my face covered, one arm pinned up, and the other fist clenched from anxiety and pain. This was when Viannelly crawled under my bed (multiple doctors in the room, hard to move around) to get to my open-hand side just so she could comfort me with a handhold. Although this simple act might not seem like a lot to most, to me, it was. Just the distraction for a moment was very relieving, and it gave me a second to catch up with myself. She did not have to do that, and many people there could have done that, but she chose to do it without being asked.
Actually, there were many times I made sure to say I was okay when mentally I wasn’t, and I’m sure she could tell. She also checked on me multiple times after, even though she was no longer my nurse because she wanted to. Aside from the many other things she did for me and my needs, these small little things just felt above and beyond. Sometimes, a little touch, a smile, or reassurance is all somebody needs.