It's 0500 and the phone rings. "We need you to come in for your call shift today. There is a pregnant patient in CICU who is really sick and whom I need to assign a nurse to. They plan to deliver her today and with her poor prognosis, it could be a really hard day. Can you do it?" The nurse responds, "I'm sorry, but I just don't think I can handle that. Can you assign someone else?" Five minutes later, the nurse calls back, "I've thought about it, and I think I should be the one to take care of that patient. I'll do it."
Backstory: Almost 3 years ago, this nurse's daughter was diagnosed with disseminated histoplasmosis and multisystem organ failure as a 16-year-old girl after participating in a mud run with her friends. After multiple hospital transfers, several months in the ICU, surviving ECMO twice and an extremely poor prognosis, this young woman is, by the grace of God, alive. However, she is in heart failure and every day is both a blessing and a struggle. This young woman is L Halliday, and her mother- Missy, a dedicated and hardworking labor and delivery nurse here at FMC. Missy and L are best friends. Missy does everything in her power to allow L to live a fulfilling and purposeful life. They cook together, attend cake nights together, she drives her to and from her college classes and on days when L just can't make it out of bed- they stay in bed together. The thought of them living without one another is unfathomable.
Words cannot describe the trauma this family went through and has continued to go through. As to be expected, exposure to cardiac patients in any fashion, particularly those who are extremely sick, is a very hard reality for Missy. However, as one of our most experienced nurses and a charge nurse, she is often exposed to these patients and these situations. Missy takes remarkable care of these patients but often walks away in tears, internalizing the patient's circumstance as well as the circumstance of her own daughter. THIS is why she initially turned down the request to be this patient's nurse who was extremely sick in the CICU. She couldn't fathom the idea of watching a young woman with a condition similar to her own daughter's, die. However, in Missy's heart, she felt she was being called to take care of this patient. So she did.
The morning proved to be difficult for many reasons. The members of this woman's health care team, in light of new information about her deteriorating condition, could not agree upon a plan of care. Do we transfer her to a different hospital? Do we deliver her here? What is the right decision for this patient and her baby? Emotions were high because a woman and her unborn baby's lives were in our hands. Her OB and Cardiac teams went back and forth many times about her plan of care. People were passionate and frustrated. Ultimately, everyone wanted what was best for this patient. After hours of discussion after discussion, the conversation cumulated to a private area outside of the patient's room. All of the care providers were there, with some on a conference call. After the conversation, I walked back towards the patient's room and saw something I will never forget as long as I live. I saw Missy knelt beside the patient's bed with their hands joined. I don't know what was being said or if anything was being said at all, but it brought tears to my eyes.
Sure, all those people conversing about this patient so passionately were also trying to take care of her, but it was Missy who REALLY gave this patient what she needed. This isn't a story about Missy or L. This is a story about how Missy treated this woman just as she treats her own daughter. She wasn't the patient in CICU who could die today. She was a woman with a family and an unborn baby to protect, who desperately needed to be treated with kindness and compassion. This is a story about how Missy worked beyond her own personal challenges, to be exactly what this woman needed at exactly the right moment.
Missy is my friend and my mentor. I think we should all aspire to take these moments with each and every one of our patients, no matter our anxieties, our biases, our realities. I'm writing this letter because I believe Missy's compassion and kindness should be shared with all. It should be celebrated.