The patient was a 19 year old with a terminal event, in the ED after a life time of coping with major health issues. Loved deeply by family, he was adopted at a young age and was an inspiration to his siblings. The family told Shelley that although he was always in pain, he was a motivation to them every day.
He required resuscitation several times on this Christmas Eve. Shelley was the primary nurse and allowed family presence at the bedside. Although it was clear that efforts would be futile, she and the team allowed the family to take the lead on when it was “time to stop”. Shelley remained compassionate in her communication and truthful about the prognosis and the grave reality. She helped them make that tough decision that helped their loved one find peace.
After his death, Shelley supported the family at the bedside in their grief. She looked at pictures and listened to family stories. Friends and family were in and out for a couple of hours. After most of the family was gone, at about 11PM, his brother asked Shelley if he could stay for awhile-“I just want to be with him on Christmas”. Of course, Shelley said “Absolutely, you stay as long as you would like”.
She was generous with her hugs and laughter with family, being the kind of nurse you would want in heartbreaking situations like this.
This patient’s mom told Shelley that he had three whishes: that he graduate from HS (he did in May); that he turn 18 (he did); and that he go to the prom (he did). And Shelley saw the photographic evidence of it all 
A few months later, Shelley shared with her team that she was at an area restaurant and a woman approached her, whom she recognized but could not immediately place. It was this patient’s “mum”. She told Shelley how wonderful she thought everyone was and how much easier it made things that Shelley allowed them in the room during the resuscitation and then to stay as long as they wanted and needed.