The IMC team recently cared for a young man for over six months. For this writing, I will call him JD. JD had multiple medical problems involving nearly every system of the body. He had minimal family support and was poorly educated. He was also very difficult to care for. Not because of his medical status, but because of the way he would treat the people that came into his room. He was rude, angry, disrespectful, and it was difficult to get him to follow a medical regimen. These behaviors were very wearing on the team.

But somewhere in these months, JD made a connection with Rosemary. She spoke to him and treated him as she would one of her own young adult children in their teens and 20's. Rosemary set limits with him and spoke to him about respect.

JD had a birthday while with us and Rosemary also planned a party for him. She made a large poster with JD and photos of the staff. JD received small gifts and Rosemary's own children brought cupcakes for the staff 'from JD'.

Their relationship came to an impasse when JD was particularly rude to Rosemary one day and she told him she would step aside, others would care for him, but she would not.

A couple weeks later, JD had a respiratory arrest. He was resuscitated and remained on the IMC. But when he came around after resuscitation, he was crying and asking for Rosemary. She was on the unit, but had another assignment. The nurse caring for JD asked her to come see him. When Rosemary came to JD's room, he told her he had to tell her he was sorry. I imagine this to be a very tender moment, especially coming from a boy so careful to not show emotion.

Rosemary accepted his apology, but.. went on to say that anyone can say 'I'm sorry'. Now, he had to pay retribution. With surprise, he asked what that meant, and she told him 'now you have to do something for me'. She went on to say that she thought it was terrible that he didn't know more about his own medical conditions. She wanted him to write a paper on something medical. She didn't care what, but it had to be medical. Of course he grumbled and didn't want to do this. But at some point later, he told her he had decided to do it on tattoos. She was very quick to say "That's great! Extra credit! But what is your medical subject?" I still have to laugh when I think of this. 'Tattoos' was not going to cut it for medical. She told him to talk to the nurses, ask questions, and he also had his phone so she knew he could Google.

A few days later she came into work and he told her he had written something. He voiced concern about his penmanship. Rosemary had also previously told him he should read his paper to the team. He voiced fear of someone thinking it was stupid or funny. She assured him no one would think that, but she gave in on this one. She read his paper herself. She marked his mis-spelling and made grammar corrections with a red pen, just like a teacher. After reading it out loud to him, she said, this is great! You did a good job!"

JD made progress, but was still a long way from well. But he was able to walk in the hall with assistance and some nurses would occasionally take him out to the garden.
Rosemary had been bringing him little art kits to work on. I remember seeing him carefully painting and Rosemary looking over saying that looks really good!"

Eventually, even the team started voicing it was time for him to move on from the IMC. Everyone worried that he might be right back, but it really was time. I don't know the end of the story for JD. That's a good thing. But I know Rosemary was more than a nurse for him. She treated him like a family member, a boy that needed attention and direction.

What you should also know about her, is that is how she is with each of her patients. The same connection may not happen, but she gives it her all. She inspires us all.