Mary Buckley
September 2021
Mary
Buckley
,
MSN, RN
Care Management
CHI Health Mercy Council Bluffs
Council Bluffs
,
IA
United States
Mary held his hand, looked him in the eye and allowed him to ventilate, listened to his guilt and anguish and loss as to what to do.
ER doctors express the value of having Mary in the ER. They have said she works with expertise and diligently seeks to do what is best for patients. She has arranged home health, shelter, etc. for patients in the ER to facilitate what’s best/needed for them.
I had an elderly couple present to the ER. They had been married greater than 60 years. The wife, who had dementia/Alzheimer was the patient, she wasn’t walking, hard to get around, etc. Her husband was bedside himself, hovering, anxious, appeared uncomfortable, as the ER work up ensued. Later in the visit, Mary sat down with the husband and gently talked to him about the facts of his wife’s condition, the amount of care she required, safety needs, etc. She was gentle but firm in telling him the hard facts. He started to cry and said that they had promised each other that they’d take care of each other, and they’d never go to a nursing home.
Mary held his hand, looked him in the eye and allowed him to ventilate, listened to his guilt and anguish and loss as to what to do. She directed him to think about what she would want him to do and what she would do if roles were reversed. Mary guided him to process reality and validated his feelings. She was realistic and yet gentle and totally helped this man process his situation and free him to make appropriate decisions for the love of his life, his soulmate. You could see his relief by his tone, expression, and calmness. What a gift Mary gave to him by validating and freeing him from that heavy burden of guilt that he had been carrying.
Mary also worked tirelessly with a patient from a facility who was held in the ER for greater than 60 hours. She was a liaison between the family/facility, the hospital/facility, contacting everyone. She worked multiple hours over several days for this patient with the ultimate goal being doing what was best and ethical for the patient. I heard her talk to the facility director with professionalism and firmness, stating facts, looking for accountability and action. I heard the family say multiple times “what would we do without you?”
I had an elderly couple present to the ER. They had been married greater than 60 years. The wife, who had dementia/Alzheimer was the patient, she wasn’t walking, hard to get around, etc. Her husband was bedside himself, hovering, anxious, appeared uncomfortable, as the ER work up ensued. Later in the visit, Mary sat down with the husband and gently talked to him about the facts of his wife’s condition, the amount of care she required, safety needs, etc. She was gentle but firm in telling him the hard facts. He started to cry and said that they had promised each other that they’d take care of each other, and they’d never go to a nursing home.
Mary held his hand, looked him in the eye and allowed him to ventilate, listened to his guilt and anguish and loss as to what to do. She directed him to think about what she would want him to do and what she would do if roles were reversed. Mary guided him to process reality and validated his feelings. She was realistic and yet gentle and totally helped this man process his situation and free him to make appropriate decisions for the love of his life, his soulmate. You could see his relief by his tone, expression, and calmness. What a gift Mary gave to him by validating and freeing him from that heavy burden of guilt that he had been carrying.
Mary also worked tirelessly with a patient from a facility who was held in the ER for greater than 60 hours. She was a liaison between the family/facility, the hospital/facility, contacting everyone. She worked multiple hours over several days for this patient with the ultimate goal being doing what was best and ethical for the patient. I heard her talk to the facility director with professionalism and firmness, stating facts, looking for accountability and action. I heard the family say multiple times “what would we do without you?”